Pain of Loss

Sometimes God does things that I can’t understand.

My day started out pretty normal on December 19, 2017. Around noon, I received a text that our grandson Evan was going to the hospital. Unfortunately, that was pretty normal, too. Evan had been suffering through brain cancer for 15 months. Actually, Evan had been suffering much longer, but it’d been 15 months since his diagnosis and the surgery to remove his brain tumor.

What made this day different was Evan’s symptoms. His mother had had problems waking him up that morning, and Evan was also having problems breathing. Our son, Josh, prompted my wife, Julie, and I to come to the hospital. When we arrived, Evan was clearly not doing well. Tests late that afternoon confirmed that cancer was once again taking its toll on Evan’s body. There was nothing more the doctors could do.

That night, shortly before midnight, God chose to take Evan to his final destination, his true home, Heaven. It devastated all of us. But what a relief it must have been for Evan. No more suffering. No more pain. No more chemo or radiation. No more shots. No more tests. No more doctors, nurses or hospitals. No more tears.

Hundreds of friends and family members attended Evan’s Celebration of Life. That day we truly celebrated what Evan had accomplished. We celebrated how many lives Evan had touched, and improved, in his short time on Earth. We didn’t even know many of those who attended Evan’s service. As our pastor said, Evan accomplished God’s purpose for him here on Earth in less than 5 years. It takes most of us much longer. What a great comfort that was, and still is.

Yes, sometimes God does things that I can’t understand. But He is God, after all. If I knew everything He knows, if I understood everything He understands, wouldn’t I be God? Well, I know I’m not. But I trust Him. I know that He had, and He still has, Evan’s best interests in His mind and His heart. I know God loves Evan more than we do. I know God is taking care of Evan way better than the doctors and nurses could here. And I look forward to seeing Evan again one day, in all his glory, in his perfected, cancer-free body.

You know, some people don’t know God and they suffer through terrible tragedies like this without hope. As believers, though, we do have hope, because of our faith in the One True God. God Himself provides us with that hope. As my friend Rayburn Hare says quite often, Jesus not only HAS the answers to all of life’s questions. Jesus IS the answer to all of life’s questions. I pray that Jesus is your answer, too. I pray you have the hope that only God provides through your faith and trust in Him.

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